Iridescent Fire

The ramblings of a fangirl

62,145 notes

What if women had minstrel cycles instead of menstrual cycles? You’d just have a guy with a lute follow you around for a week every month and play you songs constantly?

My boyfriend (via thecarrionlibrarian)

#no but can you imagine if that was how you learned once a month you weren’t pregnant#by some dude singing songs about the victory of it#you wake up and he’s there and you are so happy#this dude becomes your favorite dude#but then you realize you haven’t seen your friend’s minstrel in a while#I mean everyone notices#like half the people are on the same cycle so for one week out of four your job is just flooded with fucking minstrels everywhere#the cacophony#but Mary over there is all alone#and she’s like my minstrel is late#but we all fucking know#her minstrel has gone off to find her a baby#a nine month journey he must make alone#and until he comes back there is no music in her life#what a glorious world this would be#I love the minstrels (@onionjuggler)

(via soverymediaaddicted)

Filed under this would be awesome and lesbians would group together and have like an entire troupe of minstrels following them around and all their minstrels would be BFFs cause they know they're not going on any unexpected trips

1,999 notes

Personality Types When Killing People

I'm very sorry, you're going to die.
I don't understand why hasn't anyone murdered you yet.
*rolls eyes*
I have prepared everything for your execution
Omg look at how cool that guillotine is! I bet your blood would be spewing out everywhere. Why are you so scared?
Hey, you. Can you go kill someone for me?
Let's make it medieval themed! This is exciting!
I'll make a collage in your memory.
I'm sorry but... omg what a cute ant
Your execution will be a lesson to everyone else.
I promise to take care of your children

Filed under wow...that's actually probably pretty accurate I don't understand why hasn't anyone murdered you yet? lol

410,121 notes

Things I Never Learned In High School




  • How to do taxes
  • What taxes are
  • How to vote
  • What political parties are
  • How to write a resume/cover letter/anything related to getting a job
  • How to write a check/balance a check book
  • Anything to do with banking
  • How to do loans for college
  • How to jump start a car or other basic emergency things
  • How to buy a car or house

but I’m so glad I know the fucking pythagorean theorem

thank you

didn’t learn any of this in college either

yoooooo (part II)


(Source: boguskudos, via referenceforwriters)

Filed under life resources useful